Strange tales from ACCT 311

Spring classes started on Monday. They suck taint They are just dandy.
Just jim-dandy. Whatever that means.
I figure it's like regular dandy but with added jim.
I have an uncle Jim.
...
...

Where were we going with this?
I don't know, I thought you knew?
What do you mean 'you', we're us.
Yeah...but, wait. If...then-why are- fuck it.


Accounting 311; better known as simple math attached to annoying rules.
I have this class Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday. 3 hours a day. Yeah. That's 9 hours of Accounting in 3 days.
I feel like that's too much. But I don't really have options. I spent to much time "Finding myself" (drinking) when I was young. So now, since I'm trying not to completely disappoint the F-bomb (she wakes up next to this

everyday. So a certain amount of disappointment is unavoidable) I'm doing my best to be super responsible and finish school as soon as possible and start my career as a dream sailor snake trainer astronaut cosmonaut argonaut really really  good looking male model Manager, of something. That pays well. Thus, the spring classes.
The impressions I got from my first class were as follows:

The Instructor
First, and foremost, were the hell is your chin? You have either a disturbing amount of face, or neck. Or both. You seemed like you did an alright job of going over the material, however, I am suspicious that when my classroom cohorts asked very good questions you responded with "Oh, uhh, yeah, we go over that in one of the later chapters. So let's just put a pin in it. Mmkay?" Either you don't want to spoil the fun of the exciting chapters to come (Accrued liabilities!!) or you don't know the answer. One of these makes a lot more sense then the other.
Most importantly, you handed out 4 separate things.
4.
Four.
Two, and then another two.
Upon you handing me these items I said "Thank you". Crazy right? I listened, and no one else said thank you. No one has manners anymore. Not once of those 4 times did she say "you're welcome", or any variant of it. She didn't say ANYTHING. I said thank you 4 fucking times, and I didn't get a single response. Some peoples kids...who teach accounting.
Yeah. I don't like her now. Is that weird?

Girl in front of me
I'm very happy for you and your purple thong. It seems very nice, and i'm sure it's not slicing your ass-region in half at all. However, I don't need to see it. I especially don't need to see it for three hours in a row. Honestly, why do you want everyone to see your underwear? I don't understand. You must know it's showing, i'm sure you feel a breeze or something. Also, other people use these chairs...so, gross.

Girl who probably used to be attractive but hasn't yet realized she's let herself go
Let me preface this by saying I don't want to be mean here. I understand we can't all be supermodels, I in particular have a face that gives me first hand experience of this lesson. I have only just recently started to become less chunky, so no, I am not judging her for her size or looks. HOWEVER. She is clearly still wearing the same pair of tight-clingy-jogging-yoga-pants-things that she was wearing 20 pounds ago. So I am sure as hell judging her for that. I mean, come on. Those pants look like they were about to explode. If there at one point was buttons on those I'm sure someone lost an eye. I didn't know man had invented fabric with such stretch yet. It's probably from NASA, those guys come up with all kinds of shit. Like tang. I'm just saying, people need to realize their body types and dress appropriately. Like me, for instance.

Classy.
Also, I may be judging extra harsh because in the course of the class she ate 3 Tim Horton's cookies.
Those are big cookies people.

Super Asian guys that sat next to me
You need to stop talking all class. Seriously, I know you get away with it because you aren't speaking english, so the teacher is to afraid to say anything and look racist. But you need to shut it up. Or I will shut it up for you. Hate crime or not.

Dumb Guy
"Uhh...I went on blackboard, but I don't have this course on there anywhere's"
"Well, you probably aren't registered for the course"
"Uhh, no. I must be."
"Why 'must you be'?"
"Uhh...I don't know."


Yeah. Spring courses. 15 hours of them every Monday, Wednesday, Friday. Woooooo.