Tuesday, November 16, 2010

Keeping up to date on Douchebaggery

Seeing as I'm sure you are all faithful readers that never miss an entirely random and extremely sparse blog post (they're also full of spelling mistakes!) you probably already heard about this fucking guy. If not, go read it. No really. I'll wait.
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*Cough*
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*Sip water*
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*Really-disgusting-sounding-and-not-at-all-hilarious-flatulence*
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Oh Hey. You're back.
What smell?
Anyways, that guy is a little ridiculous in that last story, but today he really kicked it up a notch.

In my MSYS class today we were doing presentations, quick back story on the presentation:
We are consulting for a resort, their goal is to make a more stress free, relaxing environment. Currently they have a pass-key system on a necklace that you use to identify yourself and get into your room. They want to make it easier.
The whole point of this project  was to come up with a design implementing technology that remove stress points.
The resort doesn't want anyone to have their wallet, cell phone, etc. on them. They don't want them to have to worry about having their credit card when they need something, or losing a room key.
Got it?
Good.

So this guys group goes, and yeah, they did a totally fine job. Who the hell am I to say they aren't going to get a good grade.
Oh right, that's what I do here, I judge people.
They had a system that requires a fancy machine to take a 3D image of your hand.
"Oh cool" you might say "Like fingerprints, so we can just scan our hands."
Yeah...except after you scan your hand you need to punch in a pin code.
"Well...but you still don't have to carry anything around...right?"
Wrong, they stayed with a proximity card room key.
So, as far as I can tell this has essentially added a stress in having to remember a pin, plus the cost of crazy hand imagers, and you still have to carry a key card around.

I wasn't trying to be rude, because honestly, how much do I care about another groups work (The answer; not very fucking much), but I did ask a question about the pin.
It seemed like a bit of a hassle to me to have this pin to have to remember, and I thought, well if someone forgot it and had to go through the proper channels to get a new one, I'm sure that would not be relaxing.
So I asked "If I'm out and get a little too drunk and forgot my pin, what then?"
Seems kind of reasonable I thought.
Reply from Captain McDouchery:
"Just go to the help desk. Haven't you ever been to a resort before?"
Except, when you hear those words picture them coming out of this face,
"I AM A MAN. I HAVE A BEARD...ISH THING."
Great, now you probably heard those words in your head they way they were said: Rudely.
Also, for your information, no. I have not been to a resort before. Woe is me.
Whatever. This didn't bother me too bad...if I went crazy every time someone was a dick I wouldn't make it very far in life.

He didn't leave it there however, our group went later, and even though I'm sure we are going to get quite near the same grade as the other group, we took a different route.
Our design implements a series of user friendly touch screens, and RFID bracelets.
These RFID tagged bracelets do everything; swipe them to pay, swipe them to rent a tennis racket, swipe them to get into your room. It's just a little rubber bracelet, like one of those "Live-Strong" bracelets.
So, after we present, we open it up for questions.
Guess who puts his hand up first?
"Yeah...what if I get too drunk...and then break the touch screen. What then?" Despite the fact that he was clearly being a dick, I attempt to reply, but he and his friend had already begun laughing. So, I continued to another question, a slightly more reasonable one about any possible health risks related to RFID. No joke, in the middle of answering this question another student had asked, Admiral Cunt-face interrupts with "just answer his question already." I had just begun answering it, honestly, maybe 15 seconds in. At this point I know I am a little agitated, and the rest of my group appears to be so also, so I attempt to wrap it up, but again the guy starts talking "The wristbands aren't helpful, what If I don't have arms? Then what?" (Keep in mind, his group had a 3D hand scanner) I let him know that the RFID tags are versatile and can be placed wherever is most convenient.
You'd think he'd be done.
"How are they supposed to use the touch screens without hands?"
At this point the instructor FINALLY says something, after literally sitting there the entire time letting this continue, he cuts off the guy and says we are out of time.

What a fucking douchebag.
Now, I know that sometimes I have a tendency to overreact. I also know that the way I tell this story can't properly convey the attitude in his voice.
To solve this, I've lifted the guys Facebook profile pic (PS, he should turn his security settings all the way up if he's going to be a jerk to everyone), after seeing it I'm sure you will judge for yourself.
First listed under interest: UFC. No, I'm not joking.

Yes. He set up a photo shoot for him and his bike.
No, he is not a professional motorcyclist which would be the only excuse for this behaviour.
Yes, it appears to be shot in some sort of sketchy warehouse with poorly set up lighting.
Yes, he probably had sex with the photographer after to "get into the business".
No, not a real photographer, probably just a homeless guy that shits in the back corner of the warehouse.

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